Blowing the Bridge: A Software Story
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Sex, drugs, rock'n'roll...we're talking about a hedonistic music festival, right? Nope, not according to the narrator of this tale. Instead, we're talking about an IT department, in the absurd (yet somewhat epic) story about a software project that was doomed to succeed. Exposing some of the more ridiculous aspects of corporate America and the insane characters who haunt its halls, Blowing the Bridge gives the reader a prying peep behind the curtain, at some of the more comical aspects of working with the more colorful personalities in technology. Bitterly funny throughout, it also painstakingly recounts the struggle of a small team determined to navigate a path towards building something of excellence, despite a mine field of bureaucratic stupidity and the occasional mortar round of tempting prostitutes.
And we all know the reputation of the Post Office as being efficient and ambitious...So, in any case, imagine if the Post Office were to be liquidated (which, these days, isn’t that much of a leap), and then the 'three hundred million people all with the same face' showed up at your door for a job...and you had to pick one of them (or, at least, entertain the idea of it). No...you are not allowed to kill yourself. That is not one of the options in this game. Applicant after applicant, I
the company. I walked away with a bad taste in my mouth, hating how it had all ended...but in the back of my mind, I always hoped for another chance at our redemption...and, eventually, my patience had been rewarded. Because this time, with Bobby, Simon, me, and the rest...this time, we were going to pull it off. Something Stupid This Way Sojourns And, so, the brass finally gave our team an ultimatum in the form of a set delivery date for our project. Our three groups had worked diligently
times, like when an absent-minded DBA decided to archive the very database that we were trying to pull data from (“Oh, yeah...I forgot that you were moving our product database of millions of products...Want me to put that archiving job on hold?”)...but my vigilance put a prompt stop to that. By Sunday afternoon, after two days that seemed entirely too long, the transition was complete, and like an expectant father, I anxiously waited for the new MDM system to take its first breath... ...and
patience of those in rank above him, undoubtedly because they did not like to repeatedly appear as fools. (It seemed that Tony’s words of “Perception is everything” had come back to haunt him. I can't help but admit that I profoundly enjoy the irony of that.) Unfortunately, the fate of my team did not rest at the end of a rainbow, since the gods revel in their love of tragic heroes... Epilogue With the disposal of Tony, our team merged with this new group via relocation, and at that time, I
meaningless projects which were merely a director's fanciful thoughts, to be canceled in the midst of construction or to be thrown away upon near-completion. As we became increasingly aware of our efforts' lack of importance, we all began to invest less of our time and ourselves into its quality, and subsequently, we began to spend less time even being present in the office...which, from what I remember, escaped being noticed from anyone in the higher ranks. This applied to everyone...except