Don't Be That Guy: A Collection of 60 Annoying Guys We All Know and Wish We Didn't
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Have you ever heard a guy say, “We’re pregnant,” and wanted to hurt him?
Do you have a friend who insists a stripper was into him every time you leave a strip club?
Do you know a guy who emails you the kind of porn that makes you want to cry then vomit?
These are just a few of the many guys you’ll find in Don’t Be That Guy.
our teammates’ faces. There are only five of us; it shouldn't be too hard. GUYS WHO ARE MORE COMFORTABLE NUDE AT THE GYM THAN I AM AT HOME Exactly how much of a hindrance would a towel around your waist be while you shave or clean your ears? Even when you weigh yourself, couldn't you just deduct a pound to account for the extra weight? I think you could. It seems you've found yourself a nice little loophole in the anti-exhibitionism laws of our great country. Good for you, nude gym
the sooner we can make that happen. GUYS IN STEAM ROOMS WITH WANDERING EYES Besides loosening our muscles, this steam is serving another very important purpose. It's keeping us from seeing each other's genitals. So when the steam cloud lifts between surges, and the faint, hazy images of our wee-wees become all too clear, please keep your head down. In a few moments, the haze will be back and order will once again be restored. GUY GYM TRAINERS WITH TERRIBLE BODIES You know when
fist-finger-snap combo on me and expect me to fall in sync with you. We've never done this before. In fact, you and I barely even shake hands. It's usually just a simple nod or “What's up?” So what's with the five-finger dance all of a sudden? Not to discourage your little burst of street flair, but if we're going to pull this off, you really need to walk me through it first. Just because you've been watching The Wire doesn't mean the rest of us have. GUYS WHO RUB THEIR FRIENDS’ SHOULDERS
even Dave Matthews would think that's weird. His music is very specifically written for women. His lyrics are for women. His melodies are for women. Young women with budding breasts and SATs to study for. GUYS WHO DANCE WITH THE GIRLS DANCING ON THE BAR I'm curious what your next move is … to walk in on me while I'm watching a porno? What makes you think we want to see you with your hat on sideways, smack dab in the middle of our fantasy? Just one rotation of your cabbage-patch has
Steve MacGuire, John Spooner, Jun Diaz, Matt Kelly, Ian Reichenthal, Alex McMaster, Dan Levine, Mike Weitzen, Chris Miagi, Fred & Farid, Bob Molineaux, Torres, Bobby McCourt, Macho, Mike Lawson, Mike Echel, Brian Driscoll, Cory Noonan, Jon Metters, Bryan Norman, Edward Boches, Jim Elliot, Ted Jendrysik, Dan Felgner, Scott Gutterson, Fuzz, Nick Boynton, John Pearse, Mark Waldek, Fran Gurdy, Tom Esch, Bobby McCue, Kevin Miller, Jeff Terry, Eric Haya, Dave Gray, Scott Forsberg, Jerry Ruzeki, Sean