The Dirtiest, Most Politically Incorrect Jokes Ever
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Don't Want To Offend Anyone? Then Don't F*%# Buy This Book! What did Cinderella do when she got to the ball? She choked. How do you get a blonde's eyes to sparkle? Shine a light in her ear. What's the definition of making love? It's what a woman does while a man's screwing her. How does an Englishman know that his wife is dead? Sex is still the same, but the dishes are piling up in the sink. What's the difference between an Irish wedding and an Irish funeral? One less drunk at the funeral. Why is a fat woman like a scooter? They're both fun to ride, but you wouldn't want your friends to see you on either. A woman walked into the bank to deposit a large bag of cash. "Did you hoard all this money yourself," asked the teller? She replied, "My sister whored half of it."
so ashamed that he left the village and wandered the desert for many years, too embarrassed to return to his home. Now in his seventies, he felt that he would like to return to the place of his birth. He was sure that no one would recognize him. Back in his hometown again, he headed for the marketplace, and was surprised to see a big supermarket standing in Its place.. He asked one of the shoppers how long the building had been there. "Ah!" replied the man. "This building was completed 20 years
keeper. "In fact. just an hour ago, it dragged an Englishman Into its pen and completely devoured him." "Geel" said the astonished tourist. "Why Is it lying there licking Its ass?" "Trying to get the taste out of Its mouth; said the keeper. 91 The lllrtlut. Most Palltle1lly Incorrect Jokes tver u.s. If all American women were laid end to end, I wouldn't be surprised. "Yahoo!· cried the Red Indian. He had just come across a pretty young tourist whose car had run out of gas in the Nevada
his fingers in a dyke. So she punched the shit out of him. A driver returned to his parked car and found his front fender damaged. Under the windshield wiper he found a note which said, · sorry I backed into your car. The crowd who saw me do it were most impressed when they saw me writing down my name and other particulars, but I'm not ..: It was after midnight when the veterinarian answered the phone. The call was from a little old lady seeking advice about separating two dogs that were
man who could carry two cups of coffee and ten donuts. Dwarves are banned from joining nudist colonies-they're always poking their nose into other people's affairs. NEIGHBORS The charges were being read against the man in the dock. "You are charged that on February 2Sth you murdered your wife with an axe: From the back of the court someone yelled, "You bastard!" The judge brought down his gavel and sternly demanded that there be silence In the court. " You are further charged that on the same
jumped up and headed for the door, the other called out, "I didn't know you were a fireman." "I'm not," he replied, "but my girlfriend's husband is." Dougal was a typical Scot. His wife Janet had just died and he wanted to place the least expensive death notice. He went to the newspaper office and wrote on the lodgement form, "Janet died." The clerk explained that there was a minimum charge and he could have six words. Douglas added three more words: "Janet died, Toyota for sale." ORAL HYCII'Nt